There is someone missing from the picture of all the grandchildren with my Oma. This was maybe the fourth time (maybe) we have all been together. And the one person who would have enjoyed it more than anything on earth missed out. Opa would have been in his glory. The first time we were all actually together was the only time Opa saw us all together. He passed away 6 months later. We were all together for my Oma's birthday when I was in grade 12. My cousins Sofia and Laura sneek attacked Johnny during that visit and stole his socks. How he was overpowered by two little girls I will never ever know. Opa thought it was grand. I realized this morning he's been gone for over half of my cousin Shay's life.

My Opa was an enigma wrapped in a mystery in a lot of ways. He fascinated me. He spoke several languages but he prefered to sit and listen most of the time. He never really said much but was content just observing the chaos around him that were his grandchildren. But in true Opa style, he thought it was all just grand. The louder we were the more he turned down his hearing aid and watched insanity unfold in front of him. He could scold you like nobodies business but at the same time he could spoil you until the cows came home.

What makes me the most sad about this entire situation is that John never got to meet him. I have it on very very good authority that Opa would have liked John. A lot. He would have loved his red hair and the fact that he was a farm boy and knew all those things that only farm boys know. They could have been quiet observers together. They would have watched the chaos that is Johnny, Amanda and I together.

Yesterday we went to see him. I ate John's McDonalds fries for Opa because stolen french fries taste better and I made sure only to take two napkins, one for my hand and one for the car...you know just in case.

Dear Murder City Maidens,

You made derby history last night. I watched you like a nervous pageant mom wanting nothing but the best for you. I was so proud....so ridiculously proud. For some of you this has been 2 years in the making. Okay we lost but you know what that's okay. We've never done this before...hell the other team had never done this before so we didn't know which way it would go. But you played with style, class and with an unmatched fierce determination. I am so honoured I could be part of it in some small way. Come January I swear I will take the track with you. I promise. I spoke with you a few of your afterwards at the after party. You had this beautiful post bout glow. So awesome. Thank you for your encouraging words to me afterwards as well. Thank you for thinking next time...I could do this with you. Thank you for letting me be part of this.

In derby love,
Tatiana
your merch girl extraordinaire, stats girl and loudest cheerleader

Ninja pumpkin!!!!

And his friend Lanford the devil pumpkin (if you look super duper closely you can kind of see his carrot horns.)

You would be shocked to know that Lanford is John's creation and the ninja is mine.

Many years ago Salman Rushdie was asked that question during a talk he was giving on his first book. He said it was before he was important and when he had hair. He said he's been trying to answer that question ever since.

The lecture last night was something I've been looking forward to for a while. A long while. Since it was announced. It's not every day I get to be in the same room as one of the most shockingly brilliant people in history. 3 time Booker Prize winner, come on. I had to be there. I felt smarter just being in the same room as him.

One of the most fantastic little extras I didn’t expect was the merch table! Yes there was a merch table. Set up by my favourite local book emporium McNally Robinson. Just like a rock concert. Except this was a nerdy rock concert so it was nothing but books by Rushdie. It was rush seating so we were there good and early. It wasn't set to start until 8, we were in line for seat at 7:15. Managed to get seats in the second row. Go us!

What an interesting cross section of society in attendence as well. Surban housewives, teenagers with their parents, elderly people who probably remember reading the first edition of the bible, hipsters who probably know numbers that are so indie I've never heard of them (sidenote: I hate hipsters but that's a WHOLE different blog post.) Students, teachers and we even ran into a faculty advisor from Brandon U.

He started off with a wonderful little story about U2. The song, “The ground beneath her feet” is actually based on Rushdie’s book by the same title. Apparently the first time he heard it was when Bono played it for him on his car stereo. So awesome. The thought of Salman Rushdie and Bono sitting in Bono's car listening to the car stereo just so fantastic!

He stated at one point that he could never say enough to satisfy anyone about that “little disagreement” he had with the late Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini. He did however point out that, “one of us is dead, you know that little thing they say about the pen being mightier than the sword. You don't mess with novelists." LOVE IT!

He touched on some wonderful issues such as how our private world and our public world are growing ever closer together. There is no longer that gap anymore. And the role of the novel in all of this is “…a looking-glass world, where things that seem improbable become real," He went on to say, “The world is not journalistic, the world is fictional." Another issue he touched on was humans as story telling creatures. That we all have stories, all families have stories and it’s up to us to share them and to tell them and it is our right to tell them the way we need to tell them. At this point John started elbowing me in the ribs and whispered, “See even Sir Rushdie wants you to write that book you’re suppose to write.”

He also spoke about the rights of the storyteller and that is asks a fundamental question, “Should storytellers die for what they write?” Obviously he pointed out his answer would be no. He even believes that people like Dan Brown should be allowed to live…just not write. BURN!

He also talked about how characters are defined by fate and who they are and their roles in the world are defined in the same way. He used Peanuts as an example. When Charles Schulz announced he was retiring he got thousands of emails requesting that just one Charlie Brown kick the football. In the end he decided he wouldn’t let him do that. Rushdie suggested that by letting him kick the football in essence Charlie Brown would cease to be Charlie Brown in some ways. And if Lucy didn’t pull it away she would cease to be Lucy in some ways. That if character or even really people do things that are so entirely out of character they cease being who they truly are in some ways. There has to be an honesty and truth in what you write and how you conduct yourself as a human being.

Probably the most profound thing I walked away with was when he said, “the job of the writer is to open up the universe a little bit for someone else.” And he said that transcends any chosen profession and life really. That our job as storytelling creatures is to open up the universe for other people a little bit. What a beautiful image! John mentioned that easily transends into what I do for a living. The universe that a sick child lives in is so narrow and so bleak. And what we do is come in and open it up a little bit.

Just like when I walked away from “Whip It” with a fire in my belly about derby. This lit a fire about my writing.

After the lecture as we were leaving I overhead the 15 year old boy behind us talk about the difficulties of just getting the first draft of a novel written. He had been sitting in front of us and I overheard him earlier telling a woman that he had read Rushdie’s first 5 books. WOW!!! The dad looked so proud. Anyway, I used that as my opportunity to mention NaNo to him. I told them I’m sorry for eavesdropping but...and I told them all about NaNo. This kids face just lit up. He seemed so excited and his dad thought the whole concept was just so neat. He asked a bunch of questions. So maybe one day many many years from now that kid will dedicate a book to “that really enthusiastic girl at the Rushdie lecture.”

As I elluded to a little bit eariler in this post and on bookface today and I know I even mentioned it after I played real life frogger in March there is a book I should be writing. This particular book grabbed my heart years ago. It reached in and grabbed my soul if you will and refuses to go away. But I also refuse to acknowledge that I need to write it. I need to write that book. I get asked about it quite regularly. My aunt even told me, if I don't write it for me write it for the cousins I have who don't know what I know. I need to let them in on those family stories and experiences. Think I know what I need to do.

I should also mention, he lectures like my dad. If you've ever had the pleasure of seeing my dad lecture, or speak or preach for that matter you'll understand this. And by "lecturing like my dad" I mean with one hand in his pocket, and the other hand is gesturing and with the watch on the lecturn. Even the way he took off his watch during the lecture and placed it on the lecturn and then when he put it back on was the same. The standing with his weight shifts to one side and one knee slight bent was the same as well.
 
Is there like a course that lecturers take where they learn this? Lecturing 101 perhaps?

First of all, you should have this song playing in the background whilst you read this.

I had quite the weekend in my kitchen. I started on Friday night with a bunch of green tomatoes! Wow do I know how to rock out on a Friday night! My mom always made fried green tomatoes when I was a kid. I never bothered trying them. It seemed just to out there for my 8 year old palate. Well my mom was really on to something. I discovered the trick was cornmeal and buttermilk. Oh and making sure your tomatoes are evenly coated. Why is there popcorn in my pan? Foodie trick I learned, when heating oil, throw in a popcorn kernel it will pop when your oil is hot enough. Works with every kind of oil. At the end of frying in batches I made Cajun dip and we had an awesome friday night dinner. Oh and this was monumental because John HATES pieces of raw tomato. He'll eat them in things but he would rather eat nails than a raw piece of tomato on its own. He devoured these. On Saturday I attempted bread...bread that wasn't pita, naan or flat. It was bread that actually was suppose to be a loaf. I've historically sucked ass at making bread. I made it in part to prove that maybe I can do this and in part for Shana who had an epic bread fail that had me in stitches but also had me sympathizing with every part of my foodie being. I'm pleased to report I rocked my flax french bread. In your honour Shana I cracked open a can of champagne! YES Champagne!!! Not only does Canada have wine in cans...we have champagne in cans! I also attempted one of the most hallowed foodie desserts. Creme brulee. I yet to attempt the other most hallowed foodie dessert...souffle. That's for another weekend. I made pumpkin spice creme brulee. And let me say.....oh...my...word. YUMMY!!!! The hard part waiting. Waiting and waiting for it to set. You can let it set for at least 2 hours but it's better if you do it for 24 hours. So I had to wait 24 hours. So in the mean time on Sunday morning I decided I would have an adventure with some cereal. What did I do with all this wonderful breakfast food? Cap 'n Crunch french toast. Where have you been all my life!!!!??? Oh and the plum slices make it healthy....or at least that's what I told myself. Sunday afternoon brought a foodie related adventure I've waiting to have. The purchasing of a kitchen torch! How as I going to brulee my cremes? I've been told I could use my broiler but it takes forever my mom said. AND I read doing that it can overcook your cremes and curdle them. So off to find a kitchen torch. And I must say...oh kitchen torch...you're my new best friend. John said to me, "So Ms. Warkentin, now that you've mastered bread and own a kitchen torch you're unstoppable!" Damn straight!